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Sex and disability

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Sex and disability

Postby cincyyankee » Sun Sep 13, 2009 3:25 pm

I've worked with individuals with disabilities for almost 20 years. In that time, I've become friends with a number of people with CP. I'm posting here now because of something that people seem reluctant to address; the sexual needs of individuals with CP. I'm talking about individuals who, because of the physical challenges that they and their partner have, are unable to have a sexual relationship independently. I've known many individuals who state their desire to engage in a sexual relationship with a partner who is also disabled. The typical response from the "professionals" is to simply to do nothing and try to avoid the issue. Everyone is familiar with Mazlow's heirarchy of needs, right? Well, there are some who would classify sex as one of those basic needs and I concur. I know of a few couples who who want to fulfill that need but cannot without the assistance of a third party. I have talked to a number of individuals about this; some who are willing to step in to help, others who won't. So, what I would like to get is some feedback from this forum. Basically, what are you're thoughts on facilitated sex?
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Postby JessieLynn » Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:05 pm

I only have mild CP and have so far had a 'normal' sex life only really limited to my... ahem... flexibility. It is, however, getting harder as I get older due to joint pain and spasms. So I can imagine how it must be to love someone and want to share that experience with your partner and simply not be able to without assistance. I think someone in that situation would feel very trapped. Especially if they are uneasy or unwilling to talk candidly about sex like a good portion of people are. How would you approach someone and who would it be? Very hard questions to answer and I'm sure they would have to vary form couple to couple. This isn't about sex fantasies, it's about simple mechanics. I seriously doubt it could be addressed easily. But where there is a will there is a way and the first step is to talk about it. This is definitely an issue that has merit.
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Re: Sex and disability

Postby jennifer18 » Sat Aug 14, 2010 9:09 pm

When I was in a relationship last year, I was got depressed and just going crazy because I had sex. My mom just freaked out because I'm disability but we break up because she wanted to be in my relationship I guess because I'm disability....I'm slow at things but not that, last year I though i was pregnant and I was praying and hoping that I wasn't because I don't want my child to be like me, its very hard to me because I just can't go out,....I can walk and things, but i just don't have my drivers lisence yet, I guess my mom don't want me to get them. I'm 21 now, I was 18 when I sign up
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Re: Sex and disability

Postby JessieLynn » Mon Aug 16, 2010 5:34 am

@ Jennifer18
Don't worry too much about children. CP isn't genetic. You can't pass it on to your kids like you can other things. I'm 30 and have 2 perfectly healthy boys. You can have a normal and healthy relationship and sex life, just like anyone else. I must say though, I was fortunate enough to have a mother who let me grow up as much like a child without a disability as was possiable. I wish you the best of luck in life and hope you don't take too much negitivity to heart.
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Location: Missouri

Re: Sex and disability

Postby subrata » Thu Jan 27, 2011 10:01 am

you mentioned that you have experienced natural sextual have also mentioned that your mother let not grow any negativity in your mind.then can i think that mental pressure hamper the sextual life of cp patients.
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Re: Sex and disability

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Re: Sex and disability

Postby JessicaWriter85 » Mon Mar 09, 2015 4:19 pm

It's absolutely true that a lot of consideration with sex when you have CP goes into simple mechanics. You have to know your body really well -- what you can handle, what you can't, how you can be creative to offset things. It definitely takes a really understanding partner, too, because it can take a while to figure all this out. You learn some interesting things about yourself, too, along the way. I never would have thought until it happened that I would consider my husband taking off my braces foreplay. He doesn't quite get why it works, but he goes with it. Whoever says that people with CP can't have satisfying sex lives doesn't know much about us! :)
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Re: Sex and disability

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Re: Sex and disability

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Re: Sex and disability

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Re: Sex and disability

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Re: Sex and disability

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